Tuesday 24 September 2019

HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS - BUT CAN A HEART BE SPREAD TOO THIN?

Images copyright MARVEL COMICS

I've sometimes wondered if, when a marriage ends and the former spouses each find someone else, whether either of them (or maybe even both) eventually grows to miss the other?  Imagine, after being wed to someone else for years, that one (or both) of them finds their mind constantly dwelling on their erstwhile partner, and eventually the two reconcile and remarry.  Although they would initially be reminded of all the happy times they'd had the first time around (before it had all gone sour), after a while, would they then start to miss their second partner in the same way that they had their first?  See, I have this theory that we tend to miss the things we no longer have but once did, and the scenario I've just laid before you is analogous (to a degree) to one that is more pertinent to me than human relationships.

For example, I've told you before that I tend to miss every house I've ever lived in, and feel that I could live in any of them again if ever the opportunity were to present itself.  However, I'm smart enough to realise that, even if I were able to spend some time revisiting a particular part of my past in one house, I'd then start to miss either a previous or subsequent one.  While it would be great to watch DVDs of TV shows I'd watched during the 1960s in the relevant house, if I then watched shows that were first broadcast in the '70s while living in another from a different decade, I'd feel out of place, and the focus of my attention (obsession?) would shift.  One's past is comprised of different components, and to be happy (if you're a nostalgist), you need access to all those components equally, not just one at the expense of the others.


I'd love to be able to re-read my collection of ODHAMS PRESS POWER COMICS in the house I inhabited in the '60s when I first had them, but I know I'd miss not being able to read my MARVEL UK comics in my next house in the '70s - so to be completely satisfied, I'd need to own all my former residences and be able spend periods in each house in turn whenever the fancy took me.  I don't think that would work with former wives or partners though, would it?  Could one flit between one and the other(s) with any kind of ease, or would it be a total nightmare?  Not something I'll ever have to worry about never having been married, so thank goodness for small mercies.  (And I'm sure there are some women who think the same whenever my name is mentioned.)  The house thing is perplexing enough.

Okay, so what's the point of this post?  (Aside from filling up a bit of space on a blog, that is.)  Oo-er, dunno.  Tell you what, make one up yourselves, and if it's any good I'll steal credit for it.  I reserve the right to disclaim any that don't appeal to me though.  Any thoughts, you know where the comments section is.  I'm off to buy a Lottery ticket.  Well, how else will I be able to buy all those houses I want?

2 comments:

Hackney Steve said...

Well, until you win the lottery the best you can do is to continue accumulating all the necessary exhibits (as you are) and wait 'til you can afford the right museums to display 'em in...
I too moved about a lot as a kid but I only have the one place I left unwillingly, so only the one bit of 'unfinished business'. The other places we were glad to get out of (always flats, always noise and worse). But I dunno if it's better or any different to have one unobtainable item rather than several?
I do get it though...I liken it to trying to complete a circuit with certain components still missing (and, in the case of some people, they'll always be missing). Every December, I dig out my Christmas issues and my Christmas TV episodes. Although I'm living in a place with absolutely no nostalgic value at all (yet) I can't imagine not watching the Christmas eps of Ghosts of Motley Hall, Love Thy Neighbour, Nearest and Dearest, The Carry On specials, etc, every year. The surroundings and the telly are all wrong, but the atmos is closer than it would be without them. Normal folk do the same in a less obsessive way and feel better by sticking Slade and Wizzerd on...nevertheless, it's still trying to recreate something that's impossible. That doesn't mean we should stop trying though...all museum exhibits are only an approximation until new stuff is rediscovered...the only important thing is that this stuff makes us feel better rather than worse...

Kid said...

I think however many places we live in, HS, nostalgists like us are always going to miss houses we think back on fondly, whether it's only one or several. The strength of feeling will be the same, the only difference being that it falls more within the realms of possibility to be able to buy one former house than many.

Talking of 'normal folk', read my post Part Two of The Exploits of Spider-Man Cover & Image Gallery to see my thoughts on that.



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