Sunday, 20 January 2019

HORROR HUMOUR...


Voice off:  "Fido, what have I told you about sitting on the furniture?"
(Or:  "Get down, Shep!")

Okay, Criv-ites, time for some fun!  Take a look at the three photos and see if you can dream up a humorous caption for each of them.  I've started things off with some mediocre lines of my own - see if you can top them.

Man on right:  "I'm gonna have you, big guy!"
Hermit:  "Leave it, Frankie, he's not worth it!"

"It wasn't my fault she fell - she walked into me!"

10 comments:

Colin Jones said...

1) "I knew I'd bought too much in the January sales - taxi!!"

2) Hermit: "No, it's not a false beard - pull it and see".

3) Woman: "There must be some mistake - they told me I'd be working with Laurel & Hardy".

Kid said...

They're good, CJ - I see a career as a gag writer beckoning. Just remember where you started.

-3- said...

I was just digging through some old issues of For Monsters Only last week, and a few similar publications in recent months. If all those old mags proved anything, it's that actually funny captions for photos from those old classic monster flics are pretty darned hard to write. Even for Stan Lee.

Kid said...

That's right, Stan used to write funny dialogue for a Marvel monster mag, didn't he? I think I saw a few pics once, but I never read a whole mag. Well, if Stan found it hard, then it must've been tough, so now I don't feel so bad. Ta, 3.

Colin Jones said...

Nobody else has chipped in so here's a few more suggestions:

1) "I've got all this junk to throw away but some b*stard has pinched my
wheelie bin".

2) Hermit: "Frankie and I support a no-deal Brexit but I see you gentlemen disagree".

3) Woman: "I really regret moving to Transylvania - the comedy double-acts just aren't as funny".

OR

Woman: "My agent told me I'd be working with two of Hollywood's biggest stars but this isn't what I had in mind".

OR

Wolf-Man: "Dracula couldn't make it to the annual monsters' reunion so he sent one of his handmaidens instead".

Kid said...

Just as well I'm not paying you for these jokes, CJ, or I'd be skint. I'm assuming that other readers just can't think of anything. However, the 'agent' gag is really just a variant on the 'Laurel & Hardy' one. Guess you're into recycling.

Colin Jones said...

We must all recycle, Kid :D

OK, here's another one instead (final one I promise)...

Wolf-Man: "Feminists want to replace the Universal monsters with female versions - she's the new Dracula and we're next !!"

Kid said...

Not me, I'm a rebel - I don't even cycle! Female monsters? Draculass, Wolfwoman, and Frankenwhine!

Dave S said...

1- Don't blame me- I told you that litter tray you bought me was far too small.

Kid said...

Good one, DS. Though I presume he's got a flap in the bottom of his trousers in order to make a deposit? (There I go, over-thinking things again.)

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