I first showed this picture several years back, but I reckon it can weather another outing. I'd been moving stuff around in one of my rooms and noticed this completely inadvertent, un-staged comic scenario: namely, The DALEKS listening intently to the words of their new Emperor, PETER RABBIT! So I decided to have a caption competition and started things off with a few of my own.
"I've just invented this sonic carrot with which we shall defeat the Doctor! The future is orange!"
"I've just invented this sonic carrot with which we shall defeat the Doctor! The future is orange!"
"Okay, Daleks - to the tune of 'Old MacDonald had a Farm' - sing up at the back now..."
"Okay, I'll choose who's going for the chips - eeny-meeny-miny-mo..."
Rolling forward to 2020, here are some more I just thought off. (Outside of the 'Emperor' scenario.)
"Glad we bought our tickets early - we got the best seats in the house!"
"Boo! Hiss! Rubbish! Get off - we want Frankie Boyle!"
"Who's the guy in the rabbit suit?"
"That's a funny shaped microphone he's holding."
"And when I count down from five, you'll suddenly all think you're naked."
"That's the biggest damn rabbit I ever saw!"
"When I wave this carrot-shaped wand and say 'Abracadabra', you'll all disappear."
"I must be in the wrong conference room - this doesn't look like the Carrot Appreciation Society's Annual gathering."
"There were these two Mechanoids..."
"Oops! Beam me up, Scotty - quick!"
"Right, you've all got your sales packs - now get out there and SELL!"
"Id like to welcome you all to the first Mormon Daleks worship service. We'll now sing a hymn."
"Wa-hey! Get 'em off!"
"That's a rubbish waxwork - it looks nothing like him!"
"Well, it was either him as new Emperor or Donald Trump! I think we chose wisely."
"Hey, Peter - we want our money back. Your bouncy castle has no bounce to it."
"This isn't right. Shouldn't the balcony seats look down at the stage?"
Huh! Tenner a ticket and then the comedian gets stage fright and forgets his routine! We should've gone to the pictures instead."
"That's the stripper? But he's only half-dressed to begin with. What a swizz!"
"I usually use the 'carrot and stick' approach, but I've misplaced my stick."
Okay, all you budding scriptwriters - leave your hilarious attempts in the comments section. "Or you will be exterminated!" (No prizes, just the joy and reward of seeing your entry published.)
Rolling forward to 2020, here are some more I just thought off. (Outside of the 'Emperor' scenario.)
"Glad we bought our tickets early - we got the best seats in the house!"
"Boo! Hiss! Rubbish! Get off - we want Frankie Boyle!"
"Who's the guy in the rabbit suit?"
"That's a funny shaped microphone he's holding."
"And when I count down from five, you'll suddenly all think you're naked."
"That's the biggest damn rabbit I ever saw!"
"When I wave this carrot-shaped wand and say 'Abracadabra', you'll all disappear."
"I must be in the wrong conference room - this doesn't look like the Carrot Appreciation Society's Annual gathering."
"There were these two Mechanoids..."
"Oops! Beam me up, Scotty - quick!"
"Right, you've all got your sales packs - now get out there and SELL!"
"Id like to welcome you all to the first Mormon Daleks worship service. We'll now sing a hymn."
"Wa-hey! Get 'em off!"
"That's a rubbish waxwork - it looks nothing like him!"
"Well, it was either him as new Emperor or Donald Trump! I think we chose wisely."
"Hey, Peter - we want our money back. Your bouncy castle has no bounce to it."
"This isn't right. Shouldn't the balcony seats look down at the stage?"
Huh! Tenner a ticket and then the comedian gets stage fright and forgets his routine! We should've gone to the pictures instead."
"That's the stripper? But he's only half-dressed to begin with. What a swizz!"
"I usually use the 'carrot and stick' approach, but I've misplaced my stick."
Okay, all you budding scriptwriters - leave your hilarious attempts in the comments section. "Or you will be exterminated!" (No prizes, just the joy and reward of seeing your entry published.)
13 comments:
My contribution last time was:
The daleks are thinking: "There's something different about this new Doctor".
Or what about:
Peter Rabbit is saying: "You should all be two metres apart - haven't you heard of social distancing??"
Peter is saying: "No, I'm not holding a sex toy - you Daleks have filthy minds".
Peter is saying: "I'm resigning as your Evil Emperor but somebody even more evil will replace me - Dominic Cummings".
The Daleks are saying: "Who's this loser? We want to see Bugs Bunny or we'll trash the joint".
Peter is saying: "At last the Daleks and Beatrix Potter characters have joined forces to conquer the universe! Nothing can stop us, MWHAHAHAHAHAHA.
We can't have this, CJ - some of your suggestions are funnier than mine. You'll give me a complex. (In the south of France hopefully.)
Lol yeah good ones Colin I liked the Dominic Cummings and social distancing ones best
That one would've worked with Jeremy Corbyn as well, McS.
Jeremy Corbyn was evil, Kid? Really? I suppose if you believe Tory propaganda and the right-wing tabloid rottweilers...
Anyway, here are some more suggestions:
The Daleks are thinking: "First we got a woman Doctor and now we've got a rabbit Doctor - will this politically-correct madness never end??"
Peter is saying: "I've called you all here today to announce that I'm coming out as gay - Benjamin Bunny and I are getting married and you're all invited".
The BBC rejected criticism that the latest series of Doctor Who looked cheap due to excessive cost-cutting.
Peter is saying: "No, I'm not holding a novelty radio and I can't get The Archers on it".
Obviously Jeremy Corbyn's name would have worked just as well - to someone on the other side of the political fence, CJ. I like to provide balance. However, as Corbyn is someone who refers to recognised terrorists (y'know - people who blow other people up, indiscriminately - including innocent people) as 'friends', there's many a person who would say that he IS evil. He's certainly a tosser. Funny how those on both sides of the Tory/Labour divide seem to believe their party's respective propaganda. Or maybe it's not so funny. At least I'm non-partisan.
I'll maybe add a few more captions - if I can think of any.
Partisan? Me? Surely you jest.
Dominic Cummings isn't evil either of course - I suppose he's just a tosser too but that wouldn't have worked so well for my caption :)
When it comes to politicians, they're ALL tossers (well, the ones in the wider public eye), CJ - whatever party they're from.
I've now added a few more captions.
Daleks think 'Now how the hell do we get out of this box?'
Dakleks think ' there's not enough room to swing a sink plunger in here!'
They levitate out of it, Woodsy. Remember, Daleks can fly.
More, more!
Peter Rabbit launched his campaign to be elected Dalek Emperor with the slogan Let's Make Skaro Great Again.
Peter Rabbit launched the campaign to take Skaro out of the Evil Union (EU) with the slogan GET SKEXIT DONE.
Peter is saying: "For the last time - no, I've never been to effin' Watership Down".
More, more, CJ.
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