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Now, usually I came in for a fair bit of mockery from my peers for my costumed exploits around the neighbourhood, as did my companion in crime-fighting, JOHN FIDLER (it's indeed fortunate that his nickname wasn't 'KID', eh?), who assumed the role of ROBIN, The BOY WONDER. However, one evening, three local girls, who'd never previously paid the slightest bit of attention to me, seemed impressed by the striking appearance of my makeshift 'utility belt' and enthusiastically asked for a demonstration of its capabilities.
Touched by their obvious interest and spurred on by the look of wonder and admiration in their eyes, I agreed, and as we were playing close to some nearby lock-ups, I headed over to the water tap used by car owners to wash their vehicles. It was housed in a grey-painted, oblong wooden 'box' against a lock-up wall, and picking up a metal bar from the ground, I placed it atop the flat surface of the box.
Directing the girls to stand at a distance over to my right (on the faux grounds that "it might be dangerous") I pretended to take some imaginary 'plastic explosive' from my belt and apply it to the iron rod. Then, standing beside the tap and preventing their uninterrupted view, I simulated the act of pressing a button on what passed for my buckle while simultaneously attempting (surreptitiously) to bring down my left elbow on the end of the bar and hopefully send it somersaulting high into the air as though propelled by the explosive.
Alas, my actual ability was very far from the equal of my ambition, and my ruse was rumbled right away. Disillusioned cries rent the air, along with contemptuous looks and jeering tones from the trio as they stormed off in disgust at my barefaced attempt to defraud them. Ah, how fickle were the affections of these three feisty females, the extent of whose eager expectations I had clearly underestimated and been found sadly lacking as a consequence.
Even today, I remember how deflating it was to see the look of awe and adoration fade from the eyes of the three former fawning fillies who, only a short time before, had regarded me as a figure worthy of respect and admiration, if not actual hero worship. There have been several females down through the years whose unrealistic expectations I've probably been unable to live up to, but nothing fills me with such feelings of failure as the memory of the faces of those three fearsome frustrated furies from so very long ago.
14 comments:
Ach, you're a hard lot to please - I'll just write my own comments.
Nice piece of evocative writing there, Gordie. You're a natural.
There, that does the job.
A nice piece of evocative writing there, Kid. You're a natural!
And clairvoyant too, CJ.
Kid, this morning I visited my local comics shop for the first time since before the pandemic and I bought that final issue of Conan The Barbarian (#25/300) which I mentioned to you a couple of months ago and which you proceeded to buy on ebay.
Which cover did your issue sport, CJ? And why did you buy it when you don't usually buy comics in paper form? Was it 'cos it's the 'last' issue?
Kid, the cover was the official one showing Conan and Belit side-by-side in fighting pose. Yes, I bought it because it's the last issue (and the 300th issue of CTB since 1970) and therefore a landmark issue. I still like to buy physical comics now and then but I haven't bought any e-comics for ages. King Conan #1 comes out in two weeks (I think - I'll have to check) so I'll try and buy that too.
That's the cover I wanted, CJ, but I just had to make do with what was available on ebay at a reasonable price. It was an okay read, but it didn't blow my socks off like you'd expect with a 'landmark' issue.
Just managed to buy one with that cover on ebay, CJ - last one the seller had.
So which cover did you get on ebay the first time, Kid? Was it the Spidey homage one you showed on the blog?
Nah, it was just a boring one of Conan leaning against something (totem pole, or part of a ship?) with his sword in his hand. That was the only one that seemed available at standard price when I looked on ebay at the time. The other covers had already skyrocketed in price. The one I've just bought with the same cover as yours cost £5.50. but it's free p&p and saves me a trip into Glasgow to buy one.
Kid, for me that Conan issue was a "landmark" for another reason too because it was the first physical comic I've ever bought in a shop without paying cash for it. Obviously I've used a card to buy e-comics but I always paid with cash in shops. I mostly stopped using cash during the pandemic and a few weeks ago I decided to go fully cashless and paid my remaining cash into my bank account.
I've started using a card more and more recently when I'm out shopping, CJ, but there's nothing beats the feel of cash in your pocket - makes me feel wealthy, even if it's only a fiver.
Great story- ever heard from your crime- fighting sidekick since then?
Ran into him a couple of times over the years in the '70s & '80s, DS, but haven't seen him since then. Swapped a couple of Facebook messages a couple or so years back for old time's sake. He doesn't live in our old town any more, so we're unlikely to run into one another. I got the impression in our FB messages that he doesn't remember much of those days, and I was surprised to learn that he's changed his surname. I can only assume he must've took such a slagging for his original one over the years and wanted to put an end to it, but it might've been for some other reason entirely. I've still got fond memories of those days, though I'm not sure that he has.
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