Believe it or not, ALICE COOPER wrote and recorded a theme song for the 1974 JAMES BOND movie The MAN With The GOLDEN GUN, but it was passed over in favour of LULU's version. I have to say, I think the producers made the right choice.
Have a listen and see what you think.
21 comments:
Kinda weak, not that the Lulu song is much better, 'He has a powerful weapon...' grief you know you're in 74 when hear that. It fits seamlessly into the world Denim after shave ads and gold medallions. I think that until Die another Day, The Man with the Golden Gun was the low point for the Bond franchise. It's a shame really Christopher Lee could've been a classic villain. The best part about the flick is the locations, the high point being Bond's flight to the island in the Republic Seabee, then they go and destroy the plane--flip's sake.
I remember seeing The Man With The Golden Gun in '75 (I think) and thinking it was great. I still enjoy it today, mainly because of my memories of it from when I was a 16 year-old, but there ARE ways it could've been improved. Love Lulu's song 'though, simply because it SOUNDS like a Bond theme.
This Alice Cooper version is rather good in my opinion - if it had been chosen for the film we'd now consider it a classic Bond theme. But I like the Lulu version and the film itself. In the late '80s I had an album (cassette) of all the Bond themes up to A View To A Kill - also included were other Bond songs like "Underneath The Mango Tree" from Dr No.
Doesn't really sound like a Bond theme to me, CJ. Too repetitive and the instrumental interludes last too long. Okay song in its own right 'though.
He's got a gun and it is golden
It's not a bun that he's holdin'
Shot him down, while he was loadin'
There so much fun, the set's explodin'
It's almost done, the girl is bloomin'
Get her down and stick the mauve in.
Chorus: Tra la la la, boom bang ah bang
repeat to fade
There you go, three minutes and I wrote a better song than both of 'em.
Never knew about this before!
I like it as an Alice song, pity it wasn't a single.
Er, not convinced that it's better than either of them, DSE, but you're entitled to your delusion - er, I mean view. As for that last line before the chorus - soap and water, DSE, soap and water...
******
Clickety-click, JP, clickety-click.
I love Alice, but this isn't great. I'd heard it before and was equally underwhelmed then.
"The Man With The Golden Gun" is almost Roger Moore's nadir (step forward "Octopussy", with Bond dressed up like a clown); he is saved by two Kung Fu-ing schoolgirls, swallows the golden bullet in the girl's belly button, teams up with JW Pepper again (an amusing interlude in "Live And Let Die", not so much here) and almost gets beaten up by Nick Nack in a traditional final fight that is almost as tense as an episode of "Pogle's Wood".
I agree with DSE; Chris Lee could have been such a classic villain. His base is suitably impressive, but it's maintained by just ONE GUY! Hardly "You Only Live Twice", was it?
And the title track? "He comes just before the kill.......Who will he bang? We shall see....." Fnarr fnarr!!
I loved "Live And Let Die" and "The Spy Who Loved Me" from Roger Moore's tenure. The rest? No, thanks.
Diamonds Are Forever also had a certain amount of innuendo in the lyrics, so it wasn't exactly a new thing for MWTGG. In fact, with DAF, Harry Saltzman objected to the song and tried to have it jettisoned. As for the one maintenance man at Scaramanga's island base, I'd agree that, at first glance, it does seem a little odd (in contrast to previous secret bases), but perhaps it was intended to convey that solar power was a low maintenance technology. In fact, I'd suggest that a legion of maintenance men would be a little incongruous for what is meant to be such a secluded hideout. I think Sean Connery's strongest Bond movies were the first three, with DAF being an enjoyable romp, and Roger's best ones were Live & Let Die, Spy Who Loved Me, Moonraker and For Your Eyes Only. As for Bond being dressed as a clown in Octopussy, given that he was trying to evade capture at a circus, the disguise was an appropriate one, and lent a little dramatic irony to the proceedings. Big Rog did a good bit of acting in that scene, in my opinion.
You know I forgot about the clown kit, doubtless a case of suppressed trauma. I suppose we should be grateful Bond's never found himself in a circumstance where he had to don a feather boa and high heels. I can picture the debrief in M's office; 'It was the most effective disguise at the time M'.
'That may be 007 but was it really necessary to submit a claim for silk lingerie on you expense sheet and isn't it about time you changed back into you Savile Row gear?'.
Well, of course Bond is a cross-dresser - he went to public school remember.
No, that scene of Bond dressed as a clown scarred me for years. I remember walking out of the cinema feeling traumatised at how low the series had sunk. Thank God the two Timothy Dalton films (the two usually conveniently forgotten when your workmates are discussing Bond, or, as referred to in Alan Partridge as "the Welsh ones")brought back some much needed grittiness. Dalton was a good Bond in my opinion, I would have liked to see him stay in the role for a while longer.
So Bond snogging himself in Diamonds Are Forever was serious drama then? Bond disguised as a clown in a CIRCUS makes perfect sense to me. How else was he going to get close to that bomb? Unfortunately, Dalton didn't have what it takes to make a convincing Bond - too wimpy-looking with his shirt off - and his two movies were low points in the series. They'd lost their originality by then and were pale, uninspired shadows of what they had once been. The only good thing about them was Desmond Llewelyn's expanded screen time in the second one, plus Davis Hedison's return as Felix Leiter.
We're gonna have to agree to disagree on this one. If Bond wanted to disguise himself in a circus, why not pick a ring master's outfit or a lion-tamer's or something. But, no, it had to be a clown for maximum laughs. Just like they couldn't resist sticking in the Margaret Thatcher scene in the otherwise decent "For Your Eyes Only".
Bond snogging himself in "DAF" always struck me as rather clever, and, anyway, it was a split-second scene. Why didn't they give clown Bond a little yellow, backfiring car to chase the bad guys in and really complete the humiliation? Why didn't he beat the villains with a big plastic water-squirting flower in his lapel?
The Connery Bonds always mixed humour with drama - and after "Russia" began veering into the ridiculous - but the producers resisted turning the movies into comedies or, worse still, farces. The Moore Bonds ran out of steam with "Moonraker" (slightly salvaged by "FYEO", granted) and were content to wallow in so-called humour (a pigeon doing a double-take as a gondola rumbles past? Jaws suddenly falling in love, renouncing his psychotic ways and discovering his voice? Puh-lease!!).
When Dalton burns Sanchez alive at the climax of "Licence To Kill", I was reminded of the scene where Connery shoots the assassin in cold blood in "Dr No". Dalton may not have been perfect, but he was a step in the right direction. And thank God the 50-something Roger Moore didn't take HIS shirt off in "A View To A Kill"!!
Why not a ringmaster or a lion tamer? Because they don't wear make-up that covers their faces is the obvious answer. And a second ringmaster walking out into the spotlight might draw some attention, but another clown would go unnoticed. However, even to consider another disguise is to suggest that Bond had a range of choices. He saw clowns coming out of their make-up trailer and made a spur-of-the-moment decision. Which was an inspired decision because it was a perfect disguise. However, I don't really need to logically justify it, even 'though I can.
The simple fact is that the writers saw a visual dichotomy of having the hero trying to save the world encumbered in a clown suit and looking far from heroic. Bond's frustration at the situation is palpable and I believe being dressed as a clown adds to the tension, because of that aforementioned visual dichotomy of a clown in a serious, life-threatening situation. The scene works.
Even more ridiculous in my view is the YOLT scene where Bond is 'transformed' into a Japanese peasant. Utterly ridiculous and just doesn't work. As for DAF's snogging scene, it only works from the viewer's point of view, not from Peter Franks', to whom it would've been obvious that there was a lone guy in an awkward position standing at the side of the stairs. However, as a brief visual joke and source of a cheap laugh, I suppose it works. The same could be argued for the pigeon's brief double-take, but either way, it's hardly fair to blame Moore for the producers' excesses.
As for the two Dalton movies - tired, uninspired pastiches, borrowing from earlier Bonds and other films. Although Dalton looked tough in the promotional stills, on screen he lacked the physical toughness required of the part and looked positively puny with his shirt off (and even with it on in some scenes). Add to that an accent that bordered on 'yokel' and a goofy profile when he smiled, and he just didn't cut it. Even the chief stuntman at the time said he lacked physical presence, and he'd know.
All Bond movies have elements of the ridiculous in them, but Big Rog's films come in for a disproportionate share of criticism, in my view.
You don't need to logically justify it 'cos you're preaching to someone who will never agree with you. "Octopussy" is an awful film, and an even worse Bond.
The Dalton movies come in for far more disproportionate criticism. Everybody dislikes them because they're the ones history dictates they dislike. He wasn't as charming as Connery or as happy to send himself up as Moore, but he wasn't a cipher. By the time of "Moonraker", Moore's Bond didn't have to even seduce the women. Everybody knows that he always ends up with the ladies, so the writers merely had him meet a fellow agent and, literally two minutes later, he's saying; "We've got two hours to kill, whatever shall we do?" or something equally moronic. Lazy writing. Early Connery might have just gotten away with it, a safari-suited Moore has no chance. And if we're talking about Bond movies ripping off earlier Bonds, as much as I love it, "The Spy Who loved Me" is a direct steal of "You Only Live Twice".
You're right, I don't NEED to justify it, nor am I trying to. What I'm doing is explaining why Bond in a clown suit, given the context, is not as absurd as you seem to think. Nor do I care whether you agree with me or not, so I'm certainly not preaching. If you prefer to extol the limited virtues of inferior films over more entertaining ones, then that's your affair. And the real reason nobody (apart from a misguided few who don't quite understand the appeal of the cinematic Bond) likes the Dalton films is not because 'they're the ones history dictates they dislike', but because they're crap, pure and simple (as testified to by the box office receipts). Dalton didn't look as if he could fight sleep, never mind a baddie. He never threw one convincing punch in his entire two Bond-film career, and looking like an angst-ridden homosexual who doesn't really like women but is prepared to do what he needs to for Queen and country doesn't make a convincing (or impressive) 007.
And as for Spy being a direct steal of YOLT, that in itself was a retread of Dr. No, and Moonraker was a retread of Spy. Plot-wise, a lot of Bond movies were repetitive, but it was the action and stunts that were the important thing, not the 'MacGuffin' of the plot. Big Rog was a great Bond, and I still prefer him to the monkey-faced dwarf in a tight suit we saw in the last four films. Who's with me? Say 'Aye'.
H'mm. Gone kinda quiet around here.
Let's just clarify a couple of things; "Octopussy" is a godawful film and Bond in a clown suit is the absolute nadir. Just when you think it can't get any worse or humiliate the character any more..... Hark; is that Rita Coolidge singing the theme music that I hear or the sound of many barrel bottoms being scraped?
"All Time High?" Oh, the irony!
You seem to think that anybody who sees fit to disagree with you fails to recognise greatness when they see it, and require your services to be guided back onto the path of the straight and narrow. I like to think I know a good film when I see it, and, since I presume you have no degree in film studies, your opinion is only as good or worthless as mine. As far as I'm concerned, it's YOU who are extolling the limited virtues of inferior films over more entertaining ones, but who really cares? The Bond movies have waxed and waned over the past fifty three years, and we all have our favourites. I happen to think that Roger Moore is a decent actor. He was great in "The Man Who Haunted Himself" and excellent in "The Wild Geese" and the seriously underrated "Shout At The Devil". However, I think he was steered in the wrong direction during his Bond tenure after "Live And Let Die". He's on record as admitting that he knew he couldn't play a tough guy like Connery, so played it for laughs instead. "Moonraker" was 95% awful, "For Your Eyes Only" was a step in the right direction, and "Octopussy" was a cesspit of a movie.
And thanks for lumping me in with those who are "misguided" and "....don't understand the appeal of cinematic Bond". I assume this includes everyone who fails to act as a nodding dog to everything you say. But then, what do I know, I prefer Daniel Craig's Bond to Moore's any day of the week.
You don't care whether I agree with you or not, I don't care whether you agree with me or not. Like the man said; "That's detente, comrade".
Let's just clarify ONE thing: on MY blog, I get to express my opinion by dint of the fact it's my blog. YOU get to express YOUR opinion on my blog merely as a courtesy I extend to you as a visitor, although you're perfectly entitled to disagree with me as I am with you. However, as a visitor, I expect you to observe a certain etiquette, whereas you seem to think you can say anything you like and that if I disagree with you, it's because I can't tolerate dissent. B*ll*cks. You expressed an opinion with which I disagree and I said so. However, because my opinion isn't in accord with yours - as I 'fail to act as a nodding dog' you might say, you seem to take it as a personal insult and keep repeating yourself. Basically, everything you accuse me of, you're guilty of yourself - and guilty of it first.
Octopussy is an entertaining enough Bond film, and Bond in a clown suit in the context of the plot makes perfect sense and adds an ironic tension to the scene. Octopussy gubbed Never Say Never Again at the box office (a movie with the 'real' Bond according to some), so I'd say it probably wasn't as bad as you seem to think. As for Roger saying he played Bond for laughs, that's just Rog being his usual self-deprecating self in my opinion. From day one, there have been different assertions about Roger's Bond. 'We had him slap women to show how tough he was meant to be' (despite Connery's Bond also slapping women, so Rog's Bond didn't do anything his predecessor hadn't), and, seemingly contrariwise, 'We played to his strengths as a light comedian'.
Daniel Craig is great in the fight scenes, but lacks the suaveness and sophistication that audiences have come to associate with Bond. He fits the description of 'a thug in a dinner suit' even more than Connery did according to some critics after the premiere of Dr. No. Broccoli, if he'd been alive, would never have cast Craig in the part (see previous posts to read why I say that). Now, we all understand what you think. You don't like Octopussy and you prefer Craig's Bond to Moore's. I DO like Octopussy and I think your emotional objection to Bond in a clown suit is unfounded. And, unlike you, I prefer Roger's Bond (and Sean's and Pierce's) to Daniel's. Everyone can now be in no doubt about what either of us thinks- although we really haven't added anything new to their store of knowledge since several comments back.
Disagree with me if you want, but there's no need to keep banging on about it. And guess what? By virtue of the fact that this is MY blog, I get the last word. Like the man said - 'Life's a bitch!'
I'm bored with this now. You're right; it's your little empire - do whatever you want with it.
You can have the last word, but I won't be reading it.
Bye.
I got bored with it a good while back, but it was only your insistence on repeating yourself that kept it going for so long. Feel threatened by someone not seeing things your way perchance? And why don't you use your real name? Oh, I forgot - you won't be reading this. Farewell.
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