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Yesterday, August 1st, was a Saturday. 33 years ago, August 1st was also a Saturday, and that was the day my family moved back to the house we'd previously lived in just over 4 years before for 11 years. That means I've now lived here three times longer the second time than I did the first, but, curiously, it doesn't feel like that. I wonder if anyone else has lived somewhere, moved away, then moved back again, and if so, what it feels like to them. Does their time away seem like a dream that never really happened, or do they just never think about it? If such a thing has ever happened to you, feel free to share your thoughts.
21 years ago, August 2nd was a Monday, and that was when I was introduced (via nearby neighbours) to a young woman called... well, her name isn't really relevant so no need to identify her. We had a brief fling, which meant more to me than to her, but I still look back on that time with a certain degree of fondness. I doubt she'd even remember me now as she led a full life, always travelling and seeking out new places and meeting new people. I remember her, though, and probably always will, but the longing dissipated a long time ago. It's a safe bet that she never had any real longing for me, so there wouldn't have been anything on her part to get over.
As I sit typing this post, the realisation that so much time has gone by from each of those events is a sobering thought. (Not that I've ever been drunk, being a lifelong teetotaller.) How can they still seem so recent when the first is over half my life away, and the second is more than a third of it? I've never been able to reconcile the mysteries, paradoxes, and complexities of time, and don't think I'll ever be able to. In one way, I'm glad that I have a pretty good memory when it comes to past events (though don't ask me what I did yesterday), but on the other, I sometimes wonder what it would be like to simply live for the day (or the morrow) and leave the past where it is - even forget it.
As you can tell, I'm in a reflective mood - if you feel you'd like to join in, please feel perfectly free.
2 comments:
I'm astonished at how my perception of time has sped up in recent years, Kid. The year 2003 still feels recent to me, but I was absolutely amazed to see a TV programme from that year described as 'vintage'!
Similarly, I was recently scouring Ebay for a short story magazine from 1999 and noticed that most of the listings from that era described the magazines as 'old', 'vintage' or in great condition 'for their age'. 1999 was almost half my lifetime ago, but it doesn't feel like that long ago to me.
That's one of the things that annoys me about some ebay sellers, DS - 'great condition for its age' conveys absolutely nothing about what kind of condition an item is actually in from an objective point of view. Another thing that annoys me is the amount of items described as 'rare' or 'hard to find' - even though they pop up on ebay all the time. As for time, the 1970s and '80s still seem recent to me even though they're 35-45 years ago.
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