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| Copyright D.C. THOMSON & Co., Ltd |
Do you think ugly people are aware they're ugly? I mean genuinely hideous people, not ordinary folk who just lack confidence and self-esteem. The reason I ask is because, when I came to do this post about Plug's (from The Bash Street Kids) own 1977 comic, I wondered if it would be allowed today as Plug's whole 'schtick' was being ugly (though, in seeming answer to my opening question, he didn't consider himself to be anything but handsome). A strip devoted to essentially making fun of an ugly buggah flies in the face of the whole 'woke' ethos that permeates far too many things in our modern age.
Anyway, I suppose that's by-the-by. A few months back I bought two copies of Plug #1 via eBay and have been planning on doing a post about it for some time. I bought my original copy in 1977, but I don't think I kept it, though it could be lingering forgotten in a cupboard somewhere, in which case I now have three copies. As I leafed through its pages, I realised there was nothing in it which really appealed to me, so I can't be bothered scanning anything from it apart from the front and back covers. Anyone remember this DCT weekly comic and, more relevant, did anyone actually buy it? (Apart from me, obviously.)
As for yours truly, do I consider myself ugly or good-looking? Well, given that another of my nicknames is Mr. Handsome, I think that's all I need to say on the matter.
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the ladies look, then look again;
I'm toned and fit, and tall and dark,
in my blue eyes resides a spark
which makes them tremble deep within
and lets me turn their hearts to 'sin'.
If truth be told, I'm quite a tease,
but women's eagerness to please -
to play the game of 'birds and bees'
and do their utmost to appease
my appetite for pleasures rare -
lets me perform with style to spare.
I am Adonis come to life,
all women wish to be my wife.
I conquer hearts with languid ease
and watch them buckle at the knees.
I laugh as their chins hit the floor
whenever I pass through a door.
E'en Sapphic slaves can't help but 'turn'
so filled with lust for me they burn,
their 'lady love' they all do spurn
and nevermore will they return
to their past wicked wanton ways,
such is the power of my gaze.
My skin is firm and tanned and smooth,
my honeyed words do serve to soothe
the fever in their lustful hearts,
pierced by cherubic Cupid's darts.
I cannot fail, I am God's gift
to women who require a 'lift'
to make them feel desired and young
by one so manly and well-hung,
who charms them with a silver tongue,
whose name and fame are so far-flung -
for me they'd all lay down and die...
and do so with a grateful sigh.
Who am I? Why...
I'm Mr. Handsome.
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