I see a once popular comics writer has announced he's 'transitioning' and becoming a woman. His business, although as he's insisted on sharing the news with the world (or at least his fans and followers on his blog and FB site), then perhaps I'll be forgiven for wondering about a few things pertaining to his situation (and that of others like him).
Does this mean that his life up to now has been a lie? Is his openly admitted long-suffered depression a result of him agonising over the years about which gender to identify with? Does his wife and children feel betrayed in discovering that he's not quite the 'man' they thought he was? As he's in his 70s, wouldn't he be better just continuing whatever time he has left as he is, instead of facing such a life-changing event in old age? Or is it, as one commenter speculated, merely a publicity stunt to draw attention to himself and his plans to write a trans character comicbook? Time will tell, I guess.
I know of someone who transitioned, and without me giving any clues as to who it is, they give a strong indication of now regretting ever having done so. My own belief (for what it's worth) is that compulsions to change genders are more than likely as a result of some form of mental illness, and should be treated as such and not indulged. Some people think they're John The Baptist, or Napoleon, or some other character from history, and some people think they were born into the wrong body. Shouldn't they all be regarded as different manifestations of the same psychological disorder?
What bothers me somewhat is the willingness of others to welcome this sort of decision as though it's a wonderful thing, rather than a worrying symptom of an underlying medical condition. The very thought of losing the 'little chap' fills me with horror and I simply can't wrap my mind around anyone deciding to willingly divest themselves of their own lifelong companion. It actually makes me feel queasy.
The writer is known for being quite an angry person, who has no truck with anyone who doesn't see things as he does. (Admittedly, though, this may only be a blog persona he adopts to conceal a sensitive side, which he'd prefer not to reveal.) Once he's past the point of no return, will he be a nicer, kinder, more polite individual than he often appears to be? Again, time will tell.
My own advice, which he wouldn't countenance for a second, would be "Don't do it!" and that advice would be the same for anyone in his situation, so I'm not picking on him. I just hope that, should his current thinking be down to some psychological delusion, he'll come to his senses before it's too late. He appears to believe in God, so to paraphrase the sentiments of the late comedian Dave Allen, may his God go with him!
50 comments:
Of course WE wouldn't want to lose our "little chap". We're in the right bodies. Trans people don't feel that way. Perhaps he's always felt "wrong" and subdued it? He's associated with the Trans community a lot in recent years so maybe it's made him finally be true to himself / herself? In the end it's their business not ours. Sex change ops have been around a very long time.
Obviously trans people don't feel that way, but it may be a delusion caused by body dysmorphic disorder. There are people who want perfectly-formed limbs amputated because they don't, for no discernible reason, feel content with them. Believing that you're the wrong gender in the wrong body may well be a symptom of a psychological disorder. And there are a good many people (not a 'couple' as the individual has claimed) who have later regretted it. Can't say I'm overly-fond of the person, but I'd hate for him (or anyone) to make such a drastic decision and regret it down the line.
While I too support adults living their lives as they please, I don't quite get the logic of the "trans position" (so to speak), even leaving out the disease possibility. They seem to be claiming that even if they're born men or women, there's some genetic proclivity that trumps the body's manifestations. Okay-- then why change the body, if you're sure that the proclivity trumps it? Neither surgery nor chemicals really change the physical programming, so I can't see that such transitions make a man feminine (and the converse) any more than a transvestite simply wearing women's clothes changes his programming. So why not just wear the opposite sex's clothes as a means of expressing your proclivity? I think vested interests argued that there was some bodily change that really brought about transformation of some sort, more equilibrium between "body and soul." But even in cases where male infants were surgically altered by accident and then raised as girls, it doesn't sound like the subjects really experienced that harmony. Read the Wikipedia article on sexologist John Money for more info if interested. I don't belief Freud's credo that "biology is destiny,." but biology sure is *part* of everyone's destiny.
I think there's a tendency to claim 'biological factors' being responsible for various tendencies, GP, as a way of avoiding being held to account for one's choices. Perhaps some people can't accept being gay, so they claim they're a woman trapped in a man's body (or vice versa). Same excuse for simply having a fetish for dressing up in women's clothing - it's a way of denying responsibility - my 'genes' made me do it. I don't think people are necessarily defined by their impulses, as they are by their choices. I also think that when people are suffering from depression, they're particularly susceptible to suggestion and are easily influenced, and once an idea takes root, it can fester like a cancer. We are what we eat, so it's said in regard to food, and I think it's the same when it comes to what our minds are fed with.
It's funny it's their business not ours until a gay person wants to undergo gay conversion therapy......but that's not allowed, they should accept who they are, but if you want to be a transam then motor along....
Kid, you don't give the identity of the comics writer so I googled comics writer transitioning and now I know - by the way, your own post appears prominently in the list of articles on the subject. As for my own opinion - I don't think it's wise for children to undergo a sex change but once somebody reaches adulthood they must be allowed to choose for themselves if that's what they want.
Even if they only want it because they might have a psychological disorder, CJ? Shouldn't society protect people from themselves if they're ill?
Dunno what a transam is, Anon, but once someone makes their business our business by going public, it's everyone's business - if they're interested.
But how do you prove they are ill, Kid?
I'd say it should be presumed as a 'given' if a man says he's a woman (or a woman a man) in the same way that someone thinking they're Donald Duck or John The Baptist is clearly not in touch with reality. I mean, it's not normal, is it?
Feeling like you were born the wrong sex isn't regarded as a psychiatric condition as far as I know and the structure of the mind is a complicated and mysterious thing so maybe some people really are born the wrong gender.
Maybe, but how do you prove it? And I'd say feeling like you were born the wrong sex should be regarded as a psychiatric condition, and people in that situation should be helped to accept how they are, not have bits chopped off them.
I don't understand how someone could go 70 plus years believing themselves to be in the wrong body then suddenly decide to go for a life-changing operation from which there is no going back. Firstly, I don't think I could be bothered after reaching that age and secondly, I don't think I'd be brave enough to risk an operation which, it could be could be argued, is unnecessary.
I'm unclear if the individual has had lifelong doubts about his gender, M, or whether they're 'relatively' recent (several years perhaps) feelings, but there may be aspects to this situation which we're not yet aware of (and may never be). However, I hope he changes his mind before it's too late.
Why are we being so coy about the comic-writer's identity when it's clearly public knowledge? Whatever the rights and wrongs of the case I hope the individual concerned will be happy being female.
We're being coy because I'm occasionally a coy kind of person, CJ. That's how I roll.
I just read that person's blog, a bit of a surprise but I wish them all the best with their decision.
I sometimes wonder if it's that kind of readiness to accept such decisions that's part of the problem in society, McS. Maybe if they received a bit of resistance to what they plan on doing, it would save them from making the wrong decision, as there's a fair number of people who have regretted it. If he wants to wear a dress and make-up, that's his business, but getting bits cut off for what is essentially a 'cosmetic' reason is too far out for me. I just don't think it's rational.
Kid, I want to make it clear to any readers of these comments that I named the comics-writer in my previous comment but you removed his name! Why? It's not a secret and he's perfectly happy for us all to know.
I didn't name him though, CJ, (in fact I went out of my way NOT to) and that set the pattern which would've been courteous of you to respect. And I rather suspect he's just a little too perfectly happy for us all to know.
It's your blog, Kid, and your rules but I still don't understand why you didn't name the individual in question.
Because: 1) I wanted the post to be more about the 'transitioning' topic in general, rather than specifically one (self-publicity seeking) individual. 2) Had I named him, given the 'run-in' I had with him a few years back, I might've been accused of trying to 'have a go' at him. 3) I'm not a fan of the man and the way he responds to people - if you'd ever read his blog you'd know why - so I just didn't want to see his name again on my blog. This post is about more than just him.
Actually I have read his blog before now, Kid, and left the odd comment which he replied to. That was several years ago and I don't know why I stopped reading the blog but I've stopped reading a number of blogs in recent years.
He has a contemptuous manner towards those he disagrees with, but I suppose IF he's been concealing his true self for years, that, and the fact that he's regarded as 'difficult to work with', as well as his career seemingly being long-behind him, well - that might make him more than just a little bitter and angry at the world.
Well according to reports the person in question struggled for years with his decision , so in his case I have to assume they are happy and thought long and hard about it, there's all I can go on there are bigger issue that cause sociable problems. According to the most recent reports 3% of folk that transitioned regretted it, that's pretty tough , but 97% were happy, and I hope " Mr I " is happy with his decision of not he's ers screwed!
I would say that, going by his depression and the way he has addressed various situations on his blog over the years, he is clearly mentally unstable in some way. I don't say that to disparage him, but he does not react like a rational human being, so his decision in regard to his gender is yet another indication of his mental disorder I'd say. And if 97% of those who have transitioned are 'happy', to me that just shows they are misguided and deluded. Those with body dysmorphia are likewise happy after their completely unnecessary amputations, but I still believe it would be better if they could be helped to accept themselves as they were born, not go getting limbs lopped off due to a recognised psychological disorder. Hey, if he wants to live as though he were a woman then he can (dresses, makeup, etc.), but all the hormone treatment and operations in the world won't actually turn him into a woman, just a grotesque caricature of one. If you've lived a 'lie' for the vast majority of your life and you're well into old-age, then just continue as you were and spare your family and yourself the trauma.
You often have a contemptuous manner towards those who disagree with you Kid so perhaps think about your glass house before you start throwing stones hey? I would also suggest you research the topic of transitioning before you judge anyone's choice on the matter.
I never have a contemptuous manner towards those who disagree with me unless they're abusive and insulting while doing so. And as for glass houses and throwing stones, I'd say that applies only to you in this situation, 'Elf'. And why not use your real name, instead of hiding behind a vertically-challenged mythical being? (Tsk, some people...)
It is strange to have a sex change so late in life but perhaps he/she feels it's better to die as the person she feels she truly is? Apparently patients have to go through interviews and tests to ensure they're making the right decision so if it was only down to mental health problems it would be picked up by the doctors and the operation wouldn't proceed.
You would hope so, wouldn't you? However, I think there's now a reluctance (or fear) amongst the medical community to view such compulsions as a psychological disorder in case of criticism from interested quarters. In my mind (and perhaps I have too simple a view) if someone believes they're something that physically they're obviously not, then however rational the patient is in other aspects of their life, they're still clearly not thinking rationally in regard to their gender. People with body dysmorphic disorder who want perfectly formed and working limbs removed are usually perfectly normal in all other areas of their lives, but they clearly have some form of mental abnormality in regard to that one aspect. As Gene Phillips suggested in his earlier comment, take a look at the Wikipedia article on John Money, in particular the bit about two boys brought up as girls because of accidents 'downstairs'.
What happened to live and let live?
If this JBI's way of living a happier, healthier life, again, what's the problem and why is it of any importance to you all?
Wondering whether someone just might be about to make the mistake of their life and articulating reservations about such a situation is no bad thing in my estimation. And it's by no means certain that the individual will be happier or healthier if he's making his decision while suffering from an underlying mental health issue. To just say 'live and let live' is far to easy (and lazy) a response.
It's supposed to be a comic blog but it not the first time Kid has posted about gays or trans. He's obsessed with men's parts.
It's supposed to be a blog about anything I want it to be - haven't you read the subtitle? Obviously not. And as the person concerned once had a comics career and posted their news on their own comics blog, the topic is a legitimate one for discussing. As for being obsessed with men's parts - only my own. You're just jealous 'cos you either don't have any or because they're the size of a gnat's. Now begone to the oblivion whence you came, o 'anonymous' one.
“ Wondering whether someone just might be about to make the mistake of their life and articulating reservations about such a situation is no bad thing in my estimation.”
If you know they’re making a mistake, of course you’re correct.
Except in JBI’s case you’re assuming that they’re doing something wrong *for them*. Unless you have some better basis for “knowing” JBI’s making a mistake in which case you’re just being bigoted. Which actually’s fine if you keep it to yourself.
I realize here in the US, our last freedom is the freedom to hate freely. Well, that and the freedom not to make a living wage or not have a civilized level of healthcare available and so on and so forth.
In the greater scheme of things, I can’t see the harm compared to a nation choosing to give up democracy for Naziism but whatever.
I suppose full disclosure requires that I don’t actually support JBI’s decision, beyond accepting it as their choice to make. It’s just that it’s no one’s business beyond that of JBI and their family.
Except for the fact that issuing what is essentially a public announcement makes it everyone's business - if they want it to be. He can do whatever he likes of course, but by turning it into a publicity-seeking event, he can't really complain (nor should anyone else) if others take an interest. He could get the swap, or just dress up in woman's clothes and makeup, or whatever, without revealing it to the world.
If you saw someone standing on a cliff edge and you asked them if they were all right, and they're response was to say that they'd had suicidal thoughts for years and were thinking of jumping off the cliff, you wouldn't say "Well, all the best with your decision, whatever makes you happy", would you? And again with the 'bigoted' accusation. That word is so misapplied by those who seek to dismiss anyone's opinion that isn't in accord with their own.
Body dysmorphia is regarded as a mental disorder, gender dysphoria isn't, but in my considered opinion it should be. Any distinction between the two strikes me as entirely too arbitrary. You're born a man (or woman, etc), you have all a man's bits and genes and hormones, yet you think you're a woman? That's a metal disorder in my book, and the only reason it's no longer regarded as such is to remove any stigma or embarrassment or humiliation from the situation. These people need help, and the help they should receive is to enable them to accept whichever gender they were born with. A 'sex change' does not turn a man into a woman (or vice versa), it merely gives them a cosmetic appearance which, in the best cases, only resembles the opposite sex they think they so wish to be. The individual we're referring to is 73, it's all a bit late for wanting to change lanes at his age.
Though I suppose it'll make interesting reading when he demands on his blog to be allowed to use women's toilets as it's his 'right'. Saints preserve us.
Just keep posting your babes of the day to try and convince people you're a "manly man" and I'm sure no one will find out your secret.
Oh no, I've been rumbled! The shame.
Just googled this entitled fool. He's a TDS nut, who accordingly feels and complains that the new US aministration are Nazi's, for not paying for his procedures with taxpayers money, 'so yes!' Mentally ill on many levels, and one butt ugly fake women t'will make...
I must confess I thought I detected signs of mental illness in him long before he made his latest announcement, just going by his extreme reactions to anyone who held a different view to him on absolutely anything. However, I don't say it to insult him, I'm merely making an observation. I suppose he's more to be pitied than anything else. Always tilting at windmills.
I'm less tolerent of folks who spread vile falsehoods to promote their genetic and personal delusion to the easily influenced. I feel it's this type, that damage and upset the balance in human understanding and society through soapboxing lies (just keep it to yourself, and you do you!). So you'll have to agree, you're the better man. Personally i'm just tired of this crap, messing with our reality.
Yeah, it becomes tedious after awhile. As I said, he's allowed to indulge his delusion if he wants to (though should keep it to himself), but hormone injections and having bits cut off won't make him into an actual woman. Yet there he is, trying to bully the rest of the world into accepting him for something he isn't and never will (or could) be. If we won't (or can't) see him as he wants us to, then we're the ones in the wrong (according to him).
Trump and co are Nazis though.
Even if so, it doesn't mean they're wrong about gender.
Nazis took away freedoms, like speech, wealth and rites to voice the truth and divided the people by race and culture. I don't see Trump doing that? He's cleaning bad government of fraud, lies, wastage, child perversion in education, corruption, biased legal systems, stupid made up science and stopping wars and outside threats to the US people's culture, welfare and country, well? You must be either blind or stupid not to see that's what he's actually doing, so not really the Nazi playbook is it? I must add that's exactly what the UK needs, but not with Farage as leader, he's pals with the fox hunters and part of the secret hunt establishment, so he could endorse an open war on our native wildlife if he got in power.
Yet he's also saying that Zelensky is a dictator and that Ukraine started the war. Not exactly consistent, is he? Anyway, let's not turn this into a discussion about Trump (or Musk, who seems a bit crazy to many).
There's truth behind that, but never spoken of, that involves years of neighbouring NATO threats to Russia, broken border ageements and corruption, but I respect your blog, it's too good to be tainted with this politics stuff. 'Good evening to all'.
There's a sentiment that I'm sure everyone agrees on - everyone having a good evening. Cheers.
So Humpty Trumpty is a genius who'll save America but his poodle Farage would be bad for Britain because he'll attack the wildlife. I must remember that!
'Too good to be tainted with this politics stuff', CJ - we're in danger of becoming tedious (or even more tedious some would probably say). If what Anon said is true, Farage may well be bad for foxes, and we wouldn't want to stress out ol' Basil, now would we?
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