THE MARK OF THE BEANO...

Dobber.  See bottom of post for his sibling

I should emphasise, in light of some ridiculous remarks that I'm 'targeting' the two individuals concerned, that this post is merely a response to fallacious remarks made about me on their Twitter sites.  As they initiated the situation, I can hardly be accused of 'picking on' them, now can I?

******  

Y'know, I reckon I'm a pretty decent guy.  I feed the poor, help the needy, and heal the sick.  True, that last one means only that I take an aspirin when I've got a headache, and, come to think of it, I'm referring to my own situation in the first two examples as well.  But, what the hell - charity begins at home they say.

Recently, someone has been having a go at me on another forum.  This person has been publicly insulting about me and has spread lies and distortions, and published a link to a photo of me on his Twitter site.  "Why?" you may ask.  Simple.  He's a dobber.  A fat, bald, dobber.  On his site, he uses intemperate language and indulges in pretty pointless tweets about nothing much at all. Except in my case, of course, as I'm extremely important.  (At least, I think that's the word the doctor used.)

The worrying thing about this is that, as he's keen to announce on his site, he works for The Beano.  Now, while it's nice to know that the role of the teaboy is not dead, given his public pronouncements, I'm surprised that the aforesaid weekly allows him to publicly advertise his association to one of Britain's once-finest institutions.  A publication primarily aimed at kids, 'tis said, by one of its other contributors, who bears an uncanny resemblance to the shifty-eyed individual in the above photo.

So what's his beef with me?  As I'm feeling in a particularly conspiratorial mood, permit me to share the facts with you.  On this other forum, a member mentioned that, after a period of Roger The Dodger's dad being rejuvenated into a younger man, his original, older appearance had now been 'restored'.  That was the good news.  The bad news was the strip was now being drawn by someone who can't actually draw very well.

To me, that's a similar scenario to being told that your terminal illness is in remission and then being run over and killed by a bus after leaving the doctor's.  So I said so - in what I considered to be an innocuous, humorous and obviously hyperbolic remark.  Note that no specific illness was mentioned.  The purpose (as the intelligent amongst you will immediately recognize) was not to mock illness or death, but simply to point out that good news can often be accompanied or followed by a less than happy result.  A comparison of ironies, in other words.

Now, it's obvious that my occasional criticisms of certain aspects of the very periodical 'Tubs' works for is the real source of his irritation with me, but he used my ironic analogy as an excuse to throw a hissy fit, call me an "idiot who spouts urine", and then indulge in a dialogue with his 'clone' in which they made some disparaging remarks about me on their Twitter accounts.

As I said, I consider myself a nice guy, but one thing which I won't tolerate is stand-ins for Tweedledum and Tweedledee attempting to stir up animosity against me by lies and distortions on their Twitter sites - or anywhere else for that matter.  If they're going to have a public go at me, then I feel not only entitled, but perfectly justified in doing likewise at them.

So, bearing in mind that they started it, I'm sure you'll understand me using my organ (behave, I'm talking about my blog) to slap down the guilty parties.  Sometimes a man's just gotta do what a man's gotta do.

So consider it done.

Separated  at birth?  I give you - 'The Dobber Twins'

******

I see that the 'twin' has posted a misleading reference to events on his own blog, and, as usual, resorts to tedious attempts at suggesting I'm an 'aggressive' troublemaker.  That's the problem with those who have an inflated sense of themselves - anyone who disagrees with them is described as being aggressive.  What he fails to mention is that on the forum in question, he has in the past been accused by others of a bullying and highhanded attitude, so I'm not the only one who has a problem with him.

He seems to think that if he says something often enough, he can thereby plant the suggestion in folk's minds that it must be the truth, but the fact is that he's the one who distorts, misrepresents - and as I irrefutably demonstrated yesterday on that other forum - just outright lies about things in his attempts to manipulate the facts to suit his purpose.  Which once again seems to be that anyone who has the 'temerity' to disagree with him is bitter, twisted and disturbed.

And marvel at his hypocrisy!  He describes my joke as 'sick', while seeing no irony in the fact that he's responsible for a so-called humour strip about a guy who continually tries to commit suicide.  You couldn't make it up!