Monday, 18 November 2019

GLASS - FRAGILE, HANDLE WITH CARE...



As you all know by now, Crivens! welcomes and even encourages the diverse opinions and observations of others.  Whether I write something, or a commenter expresses a viewpoint that a reader disagrees with, said reader is welcome to express their dissent as long as they do so politely.  (And, obviously, the first commenter should likewise have expressed his opinion in a polite way.)  Having an inquisitive mind, I like a good discussion (even if it's just as an observer) and discussing something - with a cordial exchange of different opinions - is not the same as arguing about something.  (Though I grant you, one can sometimes lead to the other.)

I'm therefore surprised why some people even have blogs.  Well, that's not quite accurate - I know why they have them - they like to express their opinions on things.  Whether it be a new comic, movie, record, etc., some people are consumed by a burning desire to tell the world what they think about it.  "Huh, cheek!" you say, "You're the exact same!"  Well, I'd say that I belong in a slightly different category, as I maintain a blog because it allows me to exercise my gradually fading mental faculties, not because I feel that others need to know what I think on any given subject.  It's therefore the former, not the latter, that leads me to write on whatever topic occurs to me (if anything).

However, even if the accusation were true, at least I'm prepared to entertain and publish other people's views that aren't in accord with my own.  How will we ever learn anything if we close our minds and refuse to consider various other viewpoints?  Expressing our thoughts and beliefs also serves to exercise our minds in the defence of what we think and believe, or revise our opinions if our defence is found wanting.  (True, that probably doesn't happen as often as it ought to.)

As I get older, because of a congenital medical disorder, I find my mind descending into blankness very often, and it can be difficult to gather my thoughts and express them in a coherent way.  You may have noticed that I sometimes use 20 words when 10 would suffice, but that's because I have to build my thoughts up, layer upon layer, as I struggle to convey what I'm trying to say or type.  My thoughts no longer arrive fully-formed and 'ready for use'.  I very often forget words mid-sentence - not just when I'm writing something, but also when I'm speaking.  I even forget what I'm talking about and my mind becomes a complete and utter blank.  

"So why should we be interested in that?" you might ask.  I'm not saying you should be, I'm merely explaining why I still maintain this blog by publishing new posts whenever I can.  I'm not trying to batter anyone over the head with the cudgel of my opinion, I'm essentially exercising a tired muscle - my mind - in an attempt to stop it from atrophying any further.  Maybe there's a chance I can even kick-start it into renewed vigour by giving it a regular workout.  I also use the blog as a personal after-the-fact diary, to record memories of my youth in case I someday forget them.  (There's at least one instance of Dementia in my family, and my fear is that I too may become stricken with it.)

However, when it comes to other bloggers, I've often noticed a resistance to any expression of dissenting opinions.  You see, if someone writes an enthusiastic review of, say, why it's great that DOCTOR WHO is now a woman - and they invite (or allow) comment - then surely if I (or anyone else) have a contrary opinion, it's no crime to express it?  Wrong - it is!  At least, it is in the mind of that type of blogger, who only wants the fawning approval and approbation of like-minded souls.  If you're of a different mind, then don't you bloody well dare have the effrontery to say so.  Dissenting opinions aren't wanted you see, only agreeable ones.

Yes, it's a surprise to me too that some people are so insecure in their beliefs that they're not prepared to be put to the effort of considering whether there might be another way of looking at things.  (Or maybe they just can't be @rsed.)  They've made up their minds and the intrusion of a contrary opinion isn't welcome, perhaps because, deep down, they know they're incapable of logically or reasonably defending what they're saying, and then they might look silly.  And that will be your fault for confusing them by asking for whys and wherefores, merely in an attempt to have an interesting and hopefully rewarding discussion about the subject.  (And sometimes just because you think there's another perfectly legitimate way of seeing things.)

Then there are those who consider their pronouncements as authoritative and beyond debate, and who accuse anyone who questions their position as 'just loving an argument'.  How dare anyone cast doubt on, or request that they clarify or defend what they believe!  It's an ego thing - they've bestowed their 'wisdom' on us, and we should just take it or leave it.  Such an attitude allows them (in their mind) to avoid having to justify anything they say if politely called to account.  Next time you're on dodgy ground with an opinion on something and someone asks you to explain, or points out a flaw in your thinking, just say "Oh, you just like to argue" and 'refuse to discuss the matter' - then you can declare whatever you want with no comeback.

These bloggers shouldn't really have a comment facility, or at the very least they should have a disclaimer stating that any opinions not in accord with those of the blogger won't be considered or published, so don't bother submitting them.  Only comments confirming their point of view are welcome, thanks very much. That would solve their 'problem', wouldn't it?  I try and show support for other blogs by leaving a comment so that the blogger doesn't think their efforts are unappreciated, but that doesn't mean I'm going to necessarily tickle their ears by pretending to agree with everything they say when I don't.

Those type of bloggers should do us all a favour; if they're not interested in our reasoned response to their opinion, then they shouldn't bother the rest of us with it in the first place.  What's that you say?  "You're not obliged to read their blogs!"  Well, that's true (though we usually do if we follow them), but neither are they obliged to write them if they're not interested in the reaction their thoughts produce (unless it's a 'positive' one of course).  And, as I said, if they're not interested in a variety of opinions in response, they know what to do.  It seems that they want to talk at us, instead of with is, and I for one am fed up with it.

Got any thoughts on the matter, fellow Crivs?  For or against, let's hear 'em.  See, I'm the type of blogger who's interested in what you have to say, good or bad.  Just be polite though, huh?

******

Incidentally, you're reading this post in one smooth swift go, but that's not the way in which it was written.  It actually hurts my head to apply my mind to something like this, because I no longer have the ability to convey my thoughts as they sequentially occur to me.  (Well, sometimes I do, but it's a rare occasion these days when I actually can.)  Usually, I have to wrestle with them, struggle with and juggle them before I get a result that's even vaguely comprehensible and that I'm (almost) satisfied with.  Of course, I can't always guarantee that my readers will be.

4 comments:

  1. I have no problems with people commenting on a particular bloggers comments ie disagreeing or agreeing Dr Who is a woman (I'll pick a subject I couldn't care less about) but it's when they dont let it go and come back time and time again, and it descends into bickering and farce etc that bores me sensless (sometimes it's fun to view but in a sad way). Make your point(s) and move on as long as your not offensive is my personal opinion/preference. As to those bloggers that dont reply to comments I dont really bother to much but understand your views on that but maybe they want to leave it up to their readers to comment (they've made their point etc in the main blog) but it's nice when folk like yourself reply. A lot of long standing comic blogs seem to be closing which is sad . Finally sorry to read about your illness/ symptoms I didn't realise that.

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  2. Regarding the first part of your comment, McS, I know from past experience how things can sometimes look not quite as they are though. I once got into a discussion with another blogger (you know to whom I refer), and was perplexed by his inability to see what it was I was actually saying. (There are different reasons for this, of course. Maybe I wasn't as clear as I could've been, or maybe he was just seeing what he wanted to see.)

    Anyway he was misrepresenting my opinion in his responses, and when I restated it, he still didn't get it, and accused me of trying to 'change his mind'. I wasn't of course, I was merely attempting to clarify what I was saying so that he could actually understand and address what my point was, not what he imagined it to be. Well, as you know, that didn't go down well. However, it may have looked that I was arguing, but I was merely saying "No, that's not what I was saying."

    Regarding the second part of your comment, I think some people are becoming dispirited by the sparsity of comment on their blogs, which is why they're closing, though there are other reasons as well of course. Maybe Facebook is more popular than Blogger these days, and people have moved over to there. Two-Headed Boy has a Facebook group, and no longer maintains his blog, presumably because he gets much more activity on FB.

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  3. Sorry to hear that you are having some mental health issues Kid. Unlike many other illness or diseases, most of us do not actively seek out preemptive strikes on conditions such as dementia. You hear people saying ' I don't want to know if I am likely to develop the condition in later life'. The terrible irony being that they probably won't know much about anything if they do not at least seek out information now in middle age on how the condition can develop and strategies you can employ to at least cope with it. Having witnessed my own mother begin the steady slip into this terrible condition, I have through trying to understand and help her, at least made my self actively aware of the condition is about and how it could effect me further down my own personal road in life that has just passed 60 years old road sign.

    These comments my have strayed far from the subject of your original blog entry but sometimes it really is just good to put out a personal opinion on something that really should matter to us all.



    Cheers
    Ken

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  4. I think I'd say 'memory health issues' rather than mental, though in my case, there are a handful of detractors who would say that you're spot on with your use of the word in regard to myself. I can relate to what you're saying about Dementia though, and you're going to find it hard going sometimes looking after your mother. It can be like Groundhog Day, but without the laughs. And don't worry about straying off the original subject, 'cos I'm not too fussy about that; as long as the post inspires an intelligent response, that'll do for me. And your comment certainly qualifies. Best of luck for the future.

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