Sunday, 21 May 2017

OO-ER! IT'S DOCTOR WHO & THE DIABOLICAL DALEKS...


                                                 Doctor Who was in his TARDIS,
                                                 which can move through time and space.
                                                 Thought he'd go and tease The Daleks,
                                                 self-appointed 'Master-Race'.

                                                 Off he went to Planet Skaro,
                                                 spinning through the endless void.
                                                 Righting wrongs while facing danger
                                                 were the things he most enjoyed.

                                                 When he landed he soon noticed
                                                 what a fearful place it was.
                                                 But the Doc was used to walking      
                                                 into danger's gaping jaws.

                                                 Off he marched to find their city,
                                                 when he got there, no surprise -
                                                 Daleks soon had him surrounded,
                                                 ray guns waving, stalks for eyes.

                                                 But the Doctor, nothing daunted,
                                                 (did you know he's got two hearts?),
                                                 had a lethal secret weapon
                                                 known as Gallifreyan farts!

                                                 Stuffed his face before he landed
                                                 with a dozen tins of beans.
                                                 Knew he'd need a huge advantage
                                                 to defeat those Dalek fiends.

                                                 Popped off farts in all directions -
                                                 My!  Did those guffs really rate.
                                                 Solid objects?  Easy targets!
                                                 Farts they can't "exterminate".

                                                 Soon the Daleks were in turmoil,
                                                 trapped within their metal shells,
                                                 There was simply no escaping
                                                 nauseating farty smells.

                                                 He was soon back in the TARDIS,
                                                 showed those Daleks he was smart.
                                                 They'll give him a wide berth next time -
                                                 now they know Time Lords can fart.

                                                 As he travelled in his TARDIS,
                                                 put his feet up, drank some tea.
                                                 That's the way it really happened -
                                                 just as he told it to me.

(BOND) BABE Of The DAY - HONOR BLACKMAN...


Here's HONOR BLACKMAN, seemingly bragging about something.  Well, she's not wrong, is she?  In the 1964 movie GOLDFINGER, legend has it that SEAN CONNERY's's original scripted response to Honor's "I'm Pussy Galore" was "So I see, but what's your name?"  It was changed to "I must be dreaming."

If the story is true, then Honor's line must've been changed as well, because in the movie, she says "My name is...", which doesn't really lend itself to the purported original reply.  Maybe the story is only apocryphal, but it's one that deserves to be true.