Sunday 9 December 2012

OH NO! SPARE US FROM ANOTHER OF THOSE 'LOOPY LAPSES IN LOGIC DEPT.' POSTS...

Images copyright MARVEL COMICS

No wonder those supervillain chappies never get anywhere with their pernicious plans for worldwide, dastardly domination - they're hardly the sharpest tools in the box, are they?  (Mind you, some of the heroes aren't much better.)  Remember THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #1, in which Spidey attempts to join the FANTASTIC FOUR, before being impersonated and framed by the CHAMELEON?

His reasoning behind using Spider-Man as a fall-guy is as follows: Hearing a news report that the web-spinner had paid a visit to the FF's skyscraper headquarters (the BAXTER BUILDING, just in case you think I'd forgotten), and in response to speculation that Spidey is being considered for membership, he concludes:  "There is only one reason Spider-Man would want to join the Fantastic Four!  Being sought by the police, there is no way for him to earn a legitimate living!  He must be desperate for money!"


Think about that for a moment.  Not only does the Chameleon make the same mistake as Spider-Man in assuming that being a member of the Cosmic Quartet is a paying gig, he totally overlooks the fact that, for all he knows, Spidey in his secret identity may well earn a respectable weekly wage working as a manager in Woolworth's.  I mean, what other hero up to that point ever got paid as if it was his fulltime profession.  (This was before LUKE CAGE, HERO FOR HIRE, remember.)

Is the Chameleon really such a total thicko that he thinks Spidey would be looking for the kind of nine-to-five job where he arrives at work in the mornings in full costume?  Gimme a break!  I'm afraid the Chameleon's logic is seriously suspect here, the result of STAN LEE or STEVE DITKO not quite thinking things through.  Spider-Man may not be able to earn a legitimate living, but PETER PARKER certainly can - even if it's only as a paperboy (being but a schoolkid - a fact the bad guy doesn't know).


Now, I know what you're going to say.  "But Spider-Man was working as a TV performer.  The Chameleon must have meant that he wouldn't be able to continue his career in showbiz because he was wanted by the police - and that's why he couldn't earn a legitimate living."  However, the Chameleon says that there is "no way", which ignores the fact that Spidey/Peter isn't necessarily restricted to a career in showbusiness.

Entertaining as it is, it's yet one more example of those loopy lapses in logic for which MARVEL were so famous.  Join us again soon for another hilarious howler from the archives.

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